Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Bodyguards Wanted

I just came across this press release from Pyr regarding the two Hugo and two Campbell Award nominations they scored. (Congratulations, by the way. Well done.) Sounds like a good bunch of folks over there... Or so I thought until Joe Abercrombie let slip that:

"My Uruk Hai hit squad are already on their way to Wisconsin to 'dramatically reduce' the chance of a Scott Lynch victory. They may well stop by David Anthony Durham's house on the way back..."

And I thought this was a refined, gentile company I was entering! Now I'm thinking I might need bodyguards. From my understanding of these things Uruk Hai don't come cheap these days, and my budget doesn't really allow for that sort of expenditure, so I'm looking for volunteers. Anybody willing to defend me from the assassins? (Oh, geeze "Assassin" is the second word in Acacia. That was silly of me to put that juju out there...)

On another note, I liked Joe Sherry's Campbell piece at Adventures in Reading. (He was kind to me.)

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Blogger Constance Brewer said...

Shall I rally the gnomes?? *g*

Otherwise, you'd have to depend on my on-again, off-again karate skills- which mainly consist of whacking things with a stick and the ancient art of advancing in the opposite direction...

8:11 PM  
Blogger Andrea Eames said...

Maybe I can rustle up a few Uruks here in New Zealand. A few of them must have stayed on after filming ended ... married locals, gave birth to weird hybrid Uruk-humans, that kind of thing.

8:13 PM  
Blogger Scott Oden said...

Never fear, David! Like Robert Redford can whisper to horses, I have the uncanny ability to jibber to Orcs. The Uruk-Hai tell me they plan a doublecross. Provided they don't trip over Constance's Gnomes, you should be fine . . .

Unless . . . Unless they're planning a *triple* cross . . . hmmm . . . but if that's the case, they might be a bit too confused and will take out the wrong author. As an added precaution, wear a shirt that has an arrow pointing left and a caption that reads (in big letters) "I'm with David Anthony Durham!" That should do it ;)

Congrats, by the way!

10:28 PM  
Blogger David Anthony Durham said...


Are gnomes good at this sort of thing? Looks can be deceptive, I guess...


Good tip about the New Zealand contingent! I've got some family down that way also, so they could help get a crew together. I'm worried about the transport costs, though. Tickets to and from NZ ain't cheap...


I like that shirt idea. Of course, I'd have to wear another shirt under it, one that says "I am David Anthony Durham!" Just in case events make go my way...

12:25 PM  
Blogger Constance Brewer said...

Despite Scott's disrespect toward the vertically challenged... he has a point. Can't get far when you're tripping over short, disgruntled, 'pass me over for Travelocity commercials will you' gnomes.

Do not take Teh Awesum Pwrr of Gnomes lightly.

2:24 PM  

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